This past week my stress levels have been off the roof. I’ve a million things to do and worry about. Between finals and the thought of failing my classes, I have been binge eating like there is no tomorrow. I’ve eaten until my stomach hurts and I feel like purging because of how much I have eaten. Afterward I tell myself to get a hold of it and to never do it again.
Though, yesterday was different. I ate so much while I was at school that by the time I was driving home my stomach couldn’t handle it anymore. Immediately, I began to freak out and feel guilty. All my mind could think of was the calories that I had consumed. My mind got so flogged that by the time I was about to park my car, I pulled out of the drive way and drove around to find a dark place where I can park. I think I must’ve driven around for like five minutes until I found a dark place…immediately after I searched for a bag, took my glasses off and stuck my fingers down my throat(for the first time in my life)I tried to make it all go away but I couldn’t…after several unsuccessful trials I gave up, threw the bag to the back of my car and drove home.
As soon as I got home, I buried myself under my covers and cried.
I don’t know what has gotten into me.